Managing Stress

Managing stress is all about taking charge: taking charge of your thoughts, your emotions, your schedule, your environment, and the way you deal with problems. The ultimate goal is a balanced life, with time for work, relationships, relaxation, and fun – plus the resilience to hold up under pressure and meet challenges head on.

Stress management starts with identifying the sources of stress in your life. This isn’t as easy as it sounds. Your true sources of stress aren’t always obvious, and it’s all too easy to overlook your own stress-inducing thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Sure, you may know that you’re constantly worried about school deadlines. But maybe it’s your procrastination, rather than the actual assignment demands, that leads to deadline stress.

To identify your true sources of stress, look closely at your habits, attitude, and excuses:
Until you accept responsibility for the role you play in creating or maintaining it, your stress level will remain outside your control.

1. Create a Serenity Prayer

AABCs of Stress Management.

ALTER: Problem-solving direct communication, organizing, planning, time management, building up resistance, setting goals, changing your perceptions.
AVOID: Walk away, let go, learn to say “no,” delegate, set limits
ACCEPT: Let go of what you cannot change or control.

When creating your own Serenity Prayer ask yourself, “What situations would I like to alter?” “What situations can I avoid?” “What situations do I need to accept?”

A Serenity Prayer is similar to the one and only Serenity Prayer that we know, “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

2. Start a stress journal

A stress journal can help you identify the regular stressors in your life and the way you deal with them. Each time you feel stressed; keep track of it in your journal. As you keep a daily log, you will begin to see patterns and common themes.
Write down:

- What caused your stress (make a guess if you’re unsure).
- How you felt, both physically and emotionally.
- How you acted in response.
- What you did to make yourself feel better.

3. Avoid unnecessary stress

Not all stress can be avoided, and it’s not healthy to avoid a situation that needs to be addressed. You may be surprised, however, by the number of stressors in your life that you can eliminate.

Learn how to say “no” – Know your limits and stick to them. Whether in your personal or professional life, refuse to accept added responsibilities when you’re close to reaching them. Taking on more than you can handle is a guaranteed recipe for stress.

Avoid people who stress you out – If someone consistently causes stress in your life and you can’t turn the relationship around, limit the amount of time you spend with that person or end the relationship entirely.

 Take control of your environment – If a particular TV show makes you anxious, turn the TV off. If traffic’s got you tense, take a longer but less-traveled route.

 Avoid hot-button topics – If you get upset over religion or politics, cross them off your conversation list. If you repeatedly argue about the same subject with the same people, stop bringing it up or excuse yourself when it’s the topic of discussion.

Narrow down your to-do list – Analyze your schedule, responsibilities, and daily tasks. If you’ve got too much on your plate, distinguish between the “shoulds” and the “musts.” Drop tasks that aren’t truly necessary to the bottom of the list or eliminate them entirely.

4. Accept the things you can’t change

Some sources of stress are unavoidable. You can’t prevent or change stressors such as the death of a loved one, a serious illness, or a national recession. In such cases, the best way to cope with stress is to accept things as they are. Acceptance may be difficult, but in the long run, it’s easier than railing against a situation you can’t change.

Don’t try to control the uncontrollable. Many things in life are beyond our control— particularly the behavior of other people. Rather than stressing out over them, focus on the things you can control such as the way you choose to react to problems.

Look for the upside. As the saying goes, “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” When facing major challenges, try to look at them as opportunities for personal growth. If your own poor choices contributed to a stressful situation, reflect on them and learn from your mistakes.

Share your feelings. Talk to a trusted friend or make an appointment with a therapist. Expressing what you’re going through can be very cathartic, even if there’s nothing you can do to change the stressful situation.

Learn to forgive. Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world and that people make mistakes. Let go of anger and resentments. Free yourself from negative energy by forgiving and moving on.

5. Make time for fun and relaxation

By having a take-charge approach and a positive attitude, you can reduce stress in your life by nurturing yourself. If you regularly make time for fun and relaxation, you’ll be in a better place to handle life’s stressors when they inevitably come.

Healthy ways to relax and recharge
 Go for a walk. 
 Spend time in nature. 
 Call a good friend. 
 Sweat out tension with a good workout. 
 Write in your journal. 
 Take a long bath. 
 Light scented candles 
Savor a warm cup of coffee or tea. Play with a pet.
Work in your garden.
Get a massage.
Curl up with a good book. Listen to music.
Watch a comedy

Don’t get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of life that you forget to take care of your own needs. Nurturing yourself is a necessity, not a luxury.

 Set aside relaxation time. Include rest and relaxation in your daily schedule. Don’t allow other obligations to interfere. This is your time to take a break from all responsibilities and recharge your batteries.

 Connect with others. Spend time with positive people who enhance your life. A strong support system will buffer you from the negative effects of stress.

 Do something you enjoy every day. Make time for leisure activities that bring you joy, whether it be reading, playing with your pet, or working on your bike.

 Keep your sense of humor. This includes the ability to laugh at yourself. The act of laughing helps your body fight stress in a number of ways.

Learn the relaxation response

You can control your stress levels with relaxation techniques that evoke the body’s relaxation response, a state of restfulness that is the opposite of the stress response. Regularly practicing these techniques will build your physical and emotional resilience, heal your body, and boost your overall feelings of joy and calmness.

The Value of Self and Content In Business

It can be tough, building your own business from scratch.

Trust me, I’ve been there.

ESPECIALLY when you’re learning to create CONTENT.

When creating content, it’s important that you understand it’s more than just knowing whom your audience is; it’s also about knowing who YOU are.

There are many entrepreneurs trying to sell you a dream when they’re unsure of their own. Uncertain of what they’re selling even works!

So as your personal development coach it is my duty to ask you, do you know yourself?

While you’re jumping straight into marketing, strategies, and content….

Do you know YOUR value and self-worth? How to use knowing that you’re purposeful and by that, what you do speaks through you?

Are you able to pin point two strengths and weaknesses that you’ve like to work on to develop your business around? Using what you already have to build a strong foundation on?

Do you understand the importance of your worth and how it plays into developing your content, your business structure, and your brand?

These are questions that you should already know the answer to.

In knowing these answers, in being able to talk with me about your self-worth and value, we can understand the direction you need to go in.

You’re not a computer. You are not a “one size fit all type of entrepreneur. You are a person with a personality, quality, and value that deserves to be put FRONT AND CENTER in her business.

So tell me, do you know your value?

How much Power and Responsibility to you take over your life?

I know that’s a huge question to be answered, and it can even be frightening to think about, but it’s a question that truly leads to a huge amount of happiness, success, and clarity within your life and business.

For example, when something good happens to you in your life, do you feel that you’re a bystander to what happen and you got “lucky” or “blessed” by a higher power with what happen, instead of realizing the energy and power you have over your actions which ATTRACTED the good and led to even better things in your life?

Or even when something bad happens to you in your life, do you feel that you are being punished for something you did in your past or that you’re punished for not doing something right, instead of actually taking responsibility of the fact that you ma have ATTRACTED that within your life by the thoughts, the feelings, the constant negative attitude that you may have been having that week?

One thing many successful entrepreneurs understand is that they have POWER to attract whatever comes into their life by being able to take RESPONSIBILITY for their actions, for their thoughts, and feelings.

They understand that they’re not a bystander and that they’re not a victim to things that happen in their life, but they can actually be in control of the things that happen within their world.

You do have control over the amount of happiness and success you have within your life. It all starts and begins with loving your mind.

Being able to start by loving yourself for who you are and what you do and do not know. For accepting your thoughts, your feelings, and being able to realize that you may have work to do, but it’s nothing that you CAN’T do.

Taking responsibility and taking the power that is rightfully yours, will help you to gain that clarity, that confidence, and success that you’re truly wanting in your life and business.

But that success and power does not come to those who feel they’re not in control of their lives.

Life

 

In the beginning, as children we all had dreams, we all wanted to be something amazing…

 

Then of course as time goes by, the “reality” of life, or what we are taught, steers us in a direction of making “socially logical” choices as to what we should do and not do.

 

We choose a career or job that we truly dislike and is not really what we imagined.

 

We suddenly realize we are going about our days in a seemingly never-ending race or rut

 

THEN you get this sense of longing that starts to rise to the surface and you begin to wonder, “How did I get here? And you question what’s next on your path.”

 

THIS is where clarity comes in. To help you understand who you are as a person, what you truly want in life, and what direction you should take next!

 

There are 3 KEY steps in helping you to gain clarity, confidence, and direction:

 

  1. The first step is self-awareness, in discovering TRULY who you are. This is a realization of what is going on inside you and around you. In gaining clarity you perspective about yourself and your life begin to change.
    1. You begin paying attention & noticing things that have always been around you
    2. You see things in a new light and begin to shift your perspective in certain areas of your life
    3. It often seems as if you are opening your eyes for the first time—really seeing what is POSSIBLE in your life. Figuring out your true needs, your true capabilities, and questioning yourself as to where to go next.

With self-awareness, you realize that you have been “blinded” by the norms of what people consider life, and now you are ready to LIVE.

  1. The second step is Direction, clarifying what you want. Your direction can be a place, an experience, and state of being or profession.
    1. When you know where you are going it gives you a greater sense of purpose and determination. It helps you create a plan to move forward since you know where forward is.
    2. You need to be aware of your vision, which is a picture of your future or present life that serves as inspiration and foundation for planning and goal setting.
    3. You need to be aware of your purpose, which shows up in the impact you are having and the one you would like to have in your life and work. Impact includes the type of difference you want to make in your work and life. It contributes to a sense of fulfillment
  2. Next we have Exploration & Action, which are basically getting started on your own path. This process allows you to take what you’ve learned about who you are and where you are going and learn what further knowledge, skills, or experience is needed—what it will take for you to get what you want!
    1. You begin to create specific goals and from those goals you create an action plan to work through and achieve them
    2. Your goals should be written down. What is most important when writing goals is that they align with your vision and intentions and that they are clear enough so you can take action around them.
    3. Your plan includes the bigger picture of all your goals and how they fit together toward the realization of your vision and intentions.
    4. Your strategy is your method of working through your goals that may include time you will devote to each goal, choosing which comes first, which goals may have a ripple effect on the others and much more. Having a strategy helps you integrate your exploration and action into your daily life

 

With these Key steps you are able to gain a more clear and confident direction in who you are and what you want in life. When you are clear in taking action or clear in who you are, you gain the confidence in KNOWING what you need to do and how to get it done.

 

This is NOT an easy process by any means, but it’s necessary when you feel like you’re stuck, you’re wanting something better for your life, and you’re wanting to succeed.

 

Success and change takes action, and as a personal empowerment coach, that’s what I am here to help you do!